It's time to stop HIDING
So I have been sitting on this blog for about 10 days now. The other week me and Nicki from Branding by Nicki needed to do some photos for our very exciting project that we are working on together! All will be revealed in the coming weeks but the experience of doing these photos sparked some pretty interesting reactions and emotions around visibility.
I will be the first to say that I hate having my picture taken, despite the fact that I know I have great skills in photographing all kinds of women and not only giving them great images but also helping to build their inner confidence so they can go out and be VISIBLE! As we all know though it's never easy to turn our own advice inwards and use it on ourselves.
The first difficulty with doing these photos was the fact we had to use an interval timer with the camera on a tripod so it's not like we had someone on the other side guiding us so the whole thing was very entertaining as we tried to guess when the camera was going to go off. Mix that with our egos wanting to pick holes in ourselves and you had a challenge. I hate selfies on an iPhone so this was borderline traumatic at points.
We got through it and actually had a lot of fun in the process. Getting the photos home though and going through them sparked a further battering from my ego.
Your nose is too big.
Urgh, look at that chin.
I can't believe you smiled properly with those teeth.
Honestly, I would never speak to anyone the way I speak to myself sometimes!! I felt like crying from the attack from my ego who was determined that because of these flaws I need to hide because of what others will think of me.
If I hadn't of done these photos with Nicki I probably would have deleted the lot. That was what made things interesting though when I sent Nicki the preview she had the exact same reaction to herself. The thing was though none of the things she berated herself for were things that I saw in her images.
I saw her for who she really is; A happy, beautiful, successful woman.
And then it gets better she saw NONE of the things I attacked myself for.
I mean what the fuck. Why is this ingrained in us as women (and probably a lot of men as well) to be so hateful towards ourselves?
Well to put it simply our inner-critic or ego is an ancient protection mechanism, the problem is that so many of us actually identify our true selves with this negative dialect in our heads. The inner-critic isn't something we are born with it will often be developed throughout our lives from the experiences we have (bullying, parents, labelling, embarrassing moments) So everytime we have an experience that causes us a painful reaction our ego will build its defense to prevent us from being exposed to that pain again.
This includes stopping us from taking the action that will help us towards the success we want.
It will tell us; We are not good enough for that job, so don't bother applying for it.
Don't go to that networking event they will all be so much better than you and you will embarrass yourself.
Don't go live on facebook you will probably ramble and no one will listen anyway.
The thing is life is filled with painful moments. We can not escape that otherwise we will not live a full life. You can not have courage and comfort, its a choice and one leads to opportunity and the other leads to stagnation.
This is the biggest block for people when it comes to being more visible.
The fear of criticism and embarrassment will literally bully us back into hiding the moment we think about stepping out of our visibility comfort zone.
As business owners, as women with purpose and passion, you HAVE to be visible EVERY SINGLE DAY!
Whether that's blogging, video, facebook live, brand photos whatever your marketing strategy you have to show up if you want to deliver your message and see the success that you so truly deserve.
Deep down in that gut of yours you know you were made for greater things, you know you have value to offer and people to help but because you identify with that inner critic of yours you are hiding.
PLEASE STOP HIDING.
The world needs more of what you have to offer. It makes me so mad that there are so many incredible women out there all with so much to offer but they are terrified of being seen because of how they talk to themselves. It's a waste especially in a world where there is so much opportunity to be seen and heard.
Never in our history has the whole world been so connected and never has there been this much opportunity for us to deliver our purpose and passion to the people who need it.
And we don't because of an inner critic that in reality doesn't mean shit. The only thing that gives it any merit is YOU.
So you have a choice, keep hovering in the shadows or step out into the light and be seen and heard by the people who need what you can offer.
Which one will you choose?
WOULD YOU LIKE TO WORK WITH ME?
I am looking for 2 people to come on a little adventure with me. Helping people is something I love and over the years in business and life I have developed a lot of skills and knowledge that I know can help others both through the struggles of business and in breaking patterns that cause us damage.
It's 8 weeks of working together and its totally free as I have no idea what this looks like yet and because I am a practical person I need to do it before I can define it. The first week will consist of a day together in Sevenoaks, Kent in the countryside (nature is playing a big part in this) and then the following 7 weeks will be 1hr sessions on Zoom.
What I expect from you is to actively take part (anything we discuss will remain totally private and between us) give me honest feedback and if I help you then a testimonial.
If you would like to know more and have a chat just fill in the form.
My name is Ami and I am primarily a photographer based in London who specialises in personal brand and commercial imagery for women in business.
I offer a range of service from full branding to mini headshot sessions that I hold 4 times a year. I really believe that the best way to connect with your clients is on an emotional and personal level that be done through beautiful imagery.
I also offer empowering boudoir photography for women who want to be brave and show a side of themselves they have never let out before and these are called The Wolf Sessions.
I am also a wedding photographer at Rubie Love Photography so emotion and authenticity is something I am not only an expert in but I also thrive on.
If you want to know more about what I do just click on the buttons